The Rear View

You know who I'm sometimes jealous of?  The people with big families.  I know that I might be romanticizing it, and that some of them might not be much more than a big group of people who all carry around heavy baggage of resentment and dislike, but whenever I hear about them or find myself around them, it always seems like a good thing to me.  It seems like those people with big families wouldn't know what to do if one day all of those family members were no longer around.

Since I have a really, really small family (dead brother, dead mother, dying father, and two aunts), I go back and forth between trying to find things in my past that I can identify with, to try to generate some sort of history of myself, and completely leaving it all behind.  Leaving it behind is not as bad as it seems, given that it doesn't amount to much in the first place, and emotionally speaking, I checked out on what little family I have long ago anyway.

I learned a long time ago to travel light emotionally, it's mostly served me well.  Lately, I've taken things a little more to heart, and so the hard things are a little harder, but I know it's healthier to not shut everything and everybody out.  I'm finding a happy medium: leave everything that's past and everything that's poisonous in the rear view mirror.

Abuse, bitterness, anger, past loves, past life: leave it behind.


***

So, in case you were wondering how this situation turned out...

I'm happy, and semi-freaked out, to report that the sexual chemistry is every bit as powerful as I thought it might be when we finally hooked up.  We texted back and forth a couple of times, then finally met up at a mutual friend's party on Saturday.  Two hours later, we left together, and shortly afterward, in his apartment, as soon as the front door shut behind us...

I love sex (surprise, surprise), and I've had a lot of partners.  A lot of those were *very* good at making me feel maximum pleasure.  Some of them needed very few cues toward what my body wanted/needed out of sex, and a precious few (maybe 2) have seemed to know exactly what I wanted before I could even tell them.

But for the first time, with this guy, all of that is beside the point.  Whenever we're together, I only want more of whatever we do, however we do it.  And the only times we haven't been together since Saturday night have been the nights we didn't spend together asleep (otherwise known as Monday night), and the times that  one or both of us are working.  I don't expect it to keep up at the same rate, but I'm enjoying the hell out of it right now, and doing my best not to worry too much about the future (even though I can't help myself sometimes).

I'll see him again tonight, and in between all the non-verbal communication, we'll hopefully have some more verbal action.  I'm still getting to know the guy, and it would be good if we continued to connect in other ways, too.  We just haven't given ourselves much opportunity to do so thus far.

***
CHECK'EM OUT!

I'm starting a new series, where I give deserved compliments to the people that I know, and many that you might know, too.  This inaugural version of CHECK'EM OUT, is for Dancing_Doll, a.k.a. Ashleigh Lake.

She's a very great and talented writer of erotic stories, and if you're lucky enough to know her, then you know she's an even better person.  That part's up to you and your shining personality, but what I can guarantee is that by going here, or here, you will find stories to keep your juices flowing and your imagination occupied for hours...and take it from me, you'll always come back for more.

In case you couldn't be bothered to click the links embedded above, here's her blog address: http://ashleighlake.blogspot.com, also linked from the right hand column of this blog.

My personal favorite is "The Blindfold Game", but her best one is up for serious and continuous debate.  So, judge for yourself...alone or with a partner that shares your love of erotic lit.